yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
