then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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