I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Randomize
