his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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