When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
she looked like the before picture.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Can you bring me the toilet please
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Randomize
