White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
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