just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
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