if i can run in heels then i can drive
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize