Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
