Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
