Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
i black out too much to be "responsible"
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
