you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Randomize
