glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize
