On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Randomize
