East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
