I saw his package. It spoke to me.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
fuck your aforementioned shoe
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize