We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Ambien. No doubt about it.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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