There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
