IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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