omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
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