are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Are my feet made of real feet?
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
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