I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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