No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
