I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
You left your phone here
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