hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
