At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
