why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Dignity is for republicans.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Randomize
