he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
