covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
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