They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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