Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
