i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Randomize
