So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
