He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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