Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
