Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize