this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Randomize
