So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Randomize