i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
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