Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
