Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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