I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
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