she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize