it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
