My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
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mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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