plz talk dirty to me
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
