roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sarcasm needs its own font
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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