i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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