Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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