ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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