Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize
